I celebrated my 28th birthday on June 10th -YAY!!!!!!!!! I had an amazing weekend, I have such a great circle of friends here in Miami. I am probably at the happiest I’ve ever been. I’ve been through many obstacles since I left Boston but where I am now mentally, physically and emotional is truly a blessing.

I broke up with the man I was seeing when I moved here (I’m using the word man loosely lol). I went from sleeping on my cousin’s couch for a few weeks to staying at a friends house for a little over a month. In what seemed to be like a forever, I rented a room from this girl that was the perfect transition because she was never home. Within a few months, through a coworker, I found a roommate and it has been a match made in heaven since lol. I cried several times and debated going back to Boston but I didn’t give up. I thought I was going to go crazy because the company I worked for went out of business and I lost a little over $5000 in miss wages, I struggled to keep up for awhile but my family stepped in tremendously. I am a hustler at heart, so during this time, I was doing small gigs to make enough money to get by. But soon after God blessed me with the perfect job for an amazing company. This transition was extremely difficult. I did everything from the silent cries, to the ugly cry where I couldn’t breathe in the car. I even thought that maybe it was a sign that I needed to go back to Boston but something in me could not come to terms with that decision.

28 is pretty close to 30, and that honestly scares the shit out of me but I am truly happy. For so long, I thought I would be married by now (HA). I am embracing all the woman I am. I am more in love with myself than I have ever been. I am empowered at how resilient I have become. I am blessed with such an amazing family, that loves me regardless of how annoying I can be (I am very annoying). I am blessed to have the group of friends I have, I love them! I cherish all of my relationships and every heartache and pain that I’ve encountered along the way. I am grateful for life, I am grateful for this life. I am beautiful, I am strong, I am sexy, I am educated, I am resilient, I am a QUEEN!

Chapter 28 – THE BEST IS YET TO COME

My roommate recently posted a picture of her having a delicious donut at one of our favorite donut shops in Wynwood. She typically grabs breakfast early in the morning to write and meditate. If anyone knows her, you know that she has one of the sickest bodies (sickest=dope=fly=her bodies amazing). She runs almost every day not because she wants to stay fit but because she finds running to be very calming. So after posting this picture, a few trolls slid into her DM (direct message) telling her the donut was not healthy or good for her. She quickly shut all of them down. She’s a big advocate of eating disorder awareness and posted a picture soon after letting people know they have no right telling her what they believe is good or unhealthy for her.

A few weeks prior something similar happened to me, unlike my roommate I hate running lol cardio and I are not friends! But I recently started doing pilates which I love, keep in mind I am also a very curvy girl(thank you, momma). On Easter Sunday I posted a snap of my Sunday dinner prepared by my mother while visiting Boston. Literally minutes after posting this video several trolls sent me messages about my meal being too greasy, unhealthy, blah blah blah. I ignored all of the messages for several reasons; 1. Whats going in my mouth is NONE OF YOUR GOTDAMN BUSINESS 2. FUCK OFF 3. I flew from Miami to Boston to be with my family and to have an amazing Haitian homecooked meal 4. I deserve that meal, dammit! Most of your trolls are taking supplements, working out twice a day, eating tasteless miserable foods that make you the miserable people you are. Some of you live and breath the gym and have no life. Do me a favor and HOP OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

No one gets to choose what healthy is for you, no one gets to tell you what you should of shouldn’t eat. Don’t get me wrong I do believe it is a necessity to be healthy, exercise and make better food choices, but that needs to be a decision you want to make for yourself and not because someone else is telling you to do so. Of course, I want to live a long life, and be healthy and look like Angela Basset when I’m 59 but I am doing so on my own terms. Lately, I’ve been working out and eating well because I want the best version of Derby(me) that I can be. But if I feel like having ice cream on Saturday night I sure the fuck will. I’ll be honest as much as I want to live a healthier lifestyle there is something I am not willing to give up, I love a nice cocktail and I will NEVER give it up. So if that means I have to eat healthier during the week to have a Cosmo on Friday night, I most certainly will lol. Love your self, love your body, love every stretch mark, love every cellulite dimple, love all your rows. Don’t like the society of Instagram fool you, most of these women Photoshop their pictures. Damn near catch a Charley horse trying to poke their hips out for a catfish booty pic. Becoming a healthier you starts from within. Love and adore yourself, make changes to your lifestyle because you love yourself so much you want to live a long and beautiful life. NEVER let anyone think they can make that decision for you.

YOU ARE FEARFULLY AND WONDERFULLY MADE- Psalm 139:14

P.S. Bri I love you, you inspire me every day!