Life is too precious to waste doing anything less than what makes us happy!
At some point in our lives, we’ve all been at a job we hate, a relationship we knew we needed to let go, friends with people we knew didn’t have our best interest at heart or living somewhere we hated, just to name a few. I’ve done all these things multiple times. Not until earlier this year, I realized that I should not and will not give me energy to anything negative, or entertain anything or anyone that I feel is not beneficial to making Derby better. Now let me be honest, this did not just happen overnight. It took some time, but I took the necessary steps to get myself there. Here are a few tips that I used to get rid of the negativity in my life.
1. Meditation – I realized that I am a control freak and my mind races non stop. I needed to take a pause, to sit in silence and breathe. Of course, this took many different tries before I could actually silence my thoughts, even if it was for a few seconds. I desperately needed to get out of my head. Meditation helped me from going crazy at one of the darkest points of my life.
2. Letting Go – I am an emotional person, I cry in seconds watching movies. But there were a lot of hidden pains that I continued struggling with and I realized that I couldn’t grow as a person if I didn’t seek help. My birth father has been non-existent my entire life. He’s stubborn, cold and cruel, but because God works the way God wants. I became his caretaker (God is funny that way). My relationship with my ex-boyfriend tested my self-esteem in many different ways. I was very insecure, I felt I wasn’t pretty enough, my weight was a constant problem, and countless other things. Loyalty is really important to me, but it took me sometime to realize that I was loyal to people who were not deserving of my loyalty. I had to let go of toxic friendships with people who were blocking my growth and my blessings. I learned to love them from a distance. This stage of growth was probably the hardest and still is lol, It took and still takes a lot of praying, books and my many journals to accept what has happened to me. I made the decision to not let these struggles dictate my story. Forgiving them was breaking down this wall of pain and guilt I built for so long. I finally released all the pain and torture. I opened myself to an entire world of beauty, self-love and pure happiness.
3. Self Care – As I started to work on inner best self – I slowly started making changes on the outside. I cut off my hair. I needed an extra humph of sexiness and there is nothing sexier than a haircut! I’m currently redesigning my bedroom because I feel my sacred place should be beautiful, warm and where I feel the most at peace. I work out (not because of fuckface ex-boyfriend) but because I need to care for me. Bi-weekly mani/pedicures and monthly wax appointments – because a hair free vagine puts a smile on my face. Traveling more – because I work really hard and I deserve to see the world.
Take a few minutes to jot down the things that make you happy, whether big or small and repeat them to yourself.
Here’s a few of mine; I am happy to be alive , happy to be at a job that I love, happy for the opportunity to write and share my thoughts with you all, happy to have the circle of family and friends I have been blessed with, happy to live in sunny Miami, happy I have no hair hitting my shoulders in this heat lol.
I am happy to be happy